I feel.... alone---lonely

How will you feel if you knot or don hv to do something you do everyday@ on a routine?

I feel lonely.

A close fren will be away for 4 days with no way of communication. Another fren will be away for at least a month, even my brother will be away for 3 weeks. The boredom is killing me slowly. I find it hard to get used to the situation. Suddenly I feel as though the world has nobody except me. All alone, helpless, scary, sad.

The biggest weakness of mine is I am able to make myself feel down and cannot lift my own mood. I like to be in the sad grey world of myself. This is so ^*#@#$%^ I myself hate. It is extremely hard for people to motivate me, almost hopeless for me to motivate myself. This is also a major problem that stop me from making important decision in life with my career.

I know this is not right but I cannot figure out the solution.

:(